


You Are More Important, Cas.

by theangelwiththewormstache



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Depressed Castiel (Supernatural), M/M, Someone just needs to tell Cas he is important and loved, Suicidal Castiel (Supernatural), Supportive Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:40:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25325539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theangelwiththewormstache/pseuds/theangelwiththewormstache
Summary: I'm rewatching season 11 and Cas is depressed and thinks nobody loves him. So I wrote this quick thing. Hopefully, by the end of season 15, someone will look him in the eye and tell him he is loved.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 71





	You Are More Important, Cas.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm rewatching season 11 and Cas is depressed and thinks nobody loves him. So I wrote this quick thing. Hopefully, by the end of season 15, someone will look him in the eye and tell him he is loved.

"Yeah, well, I can live without you. I've done it before." Dean was glaring at Cas who was ready to jump in front of a blade whenever the opportunity came and Dean was tired of it. "It hurt like hell but I did it. I did it again and again but it never hurt any less." 

Cas sighed as he looked up at the ceiling then back at Dean. "That's not the issue here, Dean."

  
"I don't give a damn about the case, Cas! If you are going to be so damn suicidal then get your ass back home. I just got you back, man. So why do you want me to mourn again?"

  
"I-I don't." Cas looked away from Dean as he took a step away from him while he matter of factly said, "I'm not suicidal."

  
"Then what is it? Cause it sure as hell didn't look like you were putting up much of a fightback there! You're lucky I even got to you on time or you'll be-" Dean didn't finish his sentence as he swallowed the word back down. "Maybe this hunt was a bad idea."

  
"Dean." Cas sounded more annoyed this time. "I'm fine. I was just overpowered-"

  
"Bullshit." Dean walked forwards and grabbed Cas's collar in his fist so he would have no choice but to look at him. "You can take out four vamps by yourself, you could easily handle one. So why do you keep trying to kill yourself?"

  
"Why does it matter?" Cas' eyes finally softening up as he puts his hands on Dean's wrist to pull him away. "As you said, Dean, you can live without me."

  
"Yeah, but who says I want to! Huh, Cas? Who says I want to go a single day without you? I need you, man!" Dean shook Cas when he looked away again. Cas didn't even bother using his strength to push Dean off, which he can easily do. "Talk to me, Cas!"

  
Cas shook his head, more like at himself than Dean, as he whispered. "I can't. It's... embarrassing. I'm an angel. I shouldn't be feeling so much. Or at all."

  
"I think that ship sailed a long time ago."

  
"You don't get it, Dean."

  
"Try me."

  
Cas finally pushed Dean's hands off him and went to sit down on the bed of the motel they were staying in. Cas put his face in his hands as he let his shoulder drop, he couldn't even look at Dean as he admitted to himself what he was feeling.

  
"I think I may kill myself but I figured, if a monster kills me then it'll be easier." Cas doesn't look up at Dean as he talks, safer to stare at a stain in the carpet from between his fingers. 

  
"Easier for who?"

  
"Me? You? Jack... I don't know." He shrugs. "It's not like you guys really need me around. I'm useless. I'm a sad excuse for a father, friend, and even an angel."

  
Cas expects more yelling but what he doesn't expect is for Dean to step in front of him and pull him up into a hug. Cas was wide-eyed as he felt Dean's fingers in his hair as his chin rested on Dean's shoulder. They didn't say anything as Cas gripped Dean's shirt or when he started to finally let the tears out. Dean just smoothed down his hair while he hummed comfortingly. 

  
He doesn't know how long they stood like that but somehow they were laying on the bed, Cas curled up on top of Dean's chest and his fingers leaving little trails on Cas back.   
His eyes were closed, just enjoying the comforting touch, as he finally breaks the silence, "Maybe I should go home."

  
"I'll call another hunter to take care of this and we'll leave in the morning," Dean reassures him in a soft tone. He didn't sound annoyed or like he pitted Cas but more matter of fact. 

  
"You're leaving too?" Cas pulled away just enough to look at Dean's face. "But Dean, you don't like walking away from a case."

  
Dean smiled up at him as his fingers then pulled him back down to rest his head. "You're more important right now, Cas."

  
He's important. Why do those words alone make him feel a little bit better?


End file.
